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Wedding Night Sex

If you’re hell-bent on having sex on your wedding night, set yourself up for “tired people sex.”


You may be looking forward to your wedding night with as much feverish excitement as you do your wedding day. But while society still suggests that every couple should have super-hot sex after a long day of planning and partying, the reality is that most couples are lucky if they manage to kiss goodnight before falling asleep.

If you think that sucks, take note: when it comes to your wedding night, our experts say the key is to plan for the worst and hope for the best.

Here we share tips to help you manage your wedding night expectations while preparing for a memorable and intimate evening whether it leads to sex or not.

Redefine what the night should be

You may not be able to control whether or not your new spouse get hot-and-heavy in your hotel room, but you can temper your expectations so that you don’t experience disappointment.

Wedding night sex falls short because history has created unrealistic expectations of what that sex should be. In short, we hold ourselves to unfair and unattainable standards about what wedding night sex should be based on stories we’ve been told by others.”

So rather than think of your wedding night as the opportunity to have the best sex of your lives, see the evening as an opportunity for an intimate rather than sexual encounter.

Sharing a bath, giving one another a massage, or using sensual touching creates intimacy and results in partners feeling connected to one another. Connection and intimacy create desire, and desire is what is truly necessary for satisfying sex.

If you’re hell-bent on having sex on your wedding night, set yourself up for “tired people sex.” This kind of sex is “nothing fancy  just lazy kind of sex.” By knowing fireworks don’t have to fly, you may be able to have your physical needs met without jumping through hoops for which you have zero energy.